Dear reader, If you look back on your past you’d see some similarities amongst all our experiences regarding the criterions to selecting a romantic partner. Of course, the ages are not defined in stone, you may experience something at 15 what one does at 13, you may experience something at 23 what one does at 20. Lets revisit them together today. Lets Imagine yourself at multiple different ages-
At Age 13– you suddenly see all your guy friends swooning over their girl classmates; they’re the same friends who last semester, used to view the female species a something otherworldly, an alien. You wonder what changed (its the hormones) and being 13, you want to fit into your friend circle, you get involved into their conversations during recess; about how Shreya looks different from last year, and is that Nidhi? Then One day some friends start teasing you, linking you with another girl after the teacher made you both sit together on the first bench when she caught you sleeping on the last bench, the girl’s cute, and you’re ballsy; one thing leads to another and you ask her if she wants to be your “GIRLFRIEND”, or whatever that means, she says yes, and you both are together (or whatever the fuck that means at 13.) point?- The criterion to love at 13, is Peer Pressure. At age 16- The Hormones are RAGING. At 16, There is no difference between you and a chimpanzee. Just the way a chimpanzee flails it arms in front of his male companions in order to appear larger then reality, displaying acts of aggression as a proof of his masculinity to attract a lady chimp; You dress up in things considered ‘Hip’ and trendy, watch things and serials considered cool, revolt against your parents and teachers to appear “different from the sheep”, maybe do things to be edgy, an angsty, serious persona, with a serious business-like tone to appear more like “how the adults do”, all with an aim that the girl you like develops feelings towards you. From a third person’ s perspective, Your activities look so comedic and funny. almost joker like, but when you’re in the moment, it feels so genuinely in character. Hence, when your parents look at you with your edgy-ness, they’re quick to point out to you that, “its just a phase.” At 16, love is all about who’s the hottest, serious, and adult like. At this age, everyone wants to look older than they are. Girls want to look 25, guys want to be 30. This is apparent in their dressing, their conversations, their portrayal of their personas. Everyone wants to look older than they are. The most popular guys are those who have their beards and muscles developed the first. The most popular girls are the ones who have the most followers on the ‘Gram. Point? – 16 is a funny age. From a third person perspective, its Hella fun to be an observer. Its surprising why there isn’t a movie made out of this already, oh wait there is. Ahem Ahem *Student of the Year* Ahem Ahem. ( Ps. No, like a birdwatcher watches birds with binoculars, hiding between bushes, I do not stalk around 16 year old’s outside my alma mater in order to get points to write my blog)
At Age 21- You start Joining the rat race of life. you start with the grind, the hustle culture. With your University Life ending, You start looking for which work opportunities will give you the most mullah. at this age its all about the mullah. At this age, the Looks are important, sure. But more than looks, its all about the tag behind your name. The to be “Doctor”s and the to be “CAs”, the ones considered “Nerds” at 16, are now the rockstars of the dating world, its now your time to shine. While the engineers, with their god complexes of taking science after 10th, will soon return to reality when they realize no one gives a shit about their degree and their promotion doesn’t depend on their work, but instead involves in being their superior’s buttered ass wipes, and the world doesn’t ACTUALLY revolve around them. Ah , The worlds a giant big circus, and we’re all just clowns laughing at each other. At 21, “What do you do” is the question one judges another person by. With a single word, one pictures the financial, intellectual, “interesting or not”, and any other characteristics of another. Behind asking the “What do you do”, is a snarky hidden motive of comparision. A comparision of the ‘reply-er’, with the ‘asker’. Based on this answer, the asker carefuly measures how much respect one deserves to be given. At 21, This is the primary criteria to choosing a partner, so that one can show them off too. (looking at history, Human activity at its core, has always been about showing off, hasnt it?)
At Age 23- This too wanes. Assuming one has a normal healthy past, The prefrontal cortex is now developed. The rationality is now visible in ones choices. At 23, Vibing is important. Money comes and goes, Beauty comes and goes, but Vibe is forever. ( I feel so cool writing this) Its all about matching of the core values, of how one perceives life, their beliefs in Nihilism, responsibilities in life, if their life is worth it, what their life goals are, what one owes to the society, if they’re optimistic or pessimistic about life, et-cetera. All these answers pave the way of healthy co-dependency of the partners. NOT saying that beauty is not important, it really really is, but its just one of the characters that can be secondary to the vibe of the person, Not critical to love. Vibe is what determines the happiness of their company, its what determines how open, how intimate you can be without them judging you. How much of “You”, you can be before they get creeped out by you, and go away.
At Age 26- Dear reader, I have no Idea. You see, Im 23 :p . Maybe Ill update the post when I turn 26. Fin.
This Blog was fun to write, however, dear reader, take it with a bit of salt. Drug dealers never consume, A single dude should never give dating advice. but eh, One can try.
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